The Wedding Factory

This Sunday I had a dilemma. There were two weddings: one was at 11:50am, and the other at 12:10 noon. Sound like an awkward time? This type of scheduling is actually the norm - it's the only way to keep up a consistent high turnover: at the second hall, weddings were scheduled at 20 minute intervals. I was forced to choose one because they were at opposite ends of the city, and this is what I saw:

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I took the subway to "Vienna Wedding". As I approached this wedding hall, people were spilling out of the four-storey building. Dressed in their Sunday best, most people were wearing black, except for a sprinkling of older people in colourful Korean traditonal clothing, or hanbok.

There were so many people milling about the lobby that the elevator was out of the question, and I was getting shoved and elbowed left, right and centre. I took the stairs, and an opportunity to check out a guy's auburn-highlighted perm as he yelled into his headset and directed human traffic into a room on a floor I passed.

It was 12:00, ten minutes before my friends wedding was supposed to start. Another wedding was still going on. The bride for the wedding I was about to attend, was in a tiny room where people could go to say hi and take pictures with her. I would argue that this is one of the only moments guests get to spend with the actual couple. There is also an area where you pay - money is traditionally given in a simple white envelope, with the contributor's name written on the outside. In exchange for your contribution, you get a numbered meal ticket.

As I put my money in an envelope, I was greeted by my friend's parents. His mother was in a hanbok, and his father was in a western suit. Both wore whtie gloves. They brought him over in his shiny grey suit with thick pastel piping - he also had a tousled piecy "bed head" look - the first time I had ever seen his hair styled. I said congratulations, he said thanks for coming, and that was all I saw of him for the rest of the day.

There were so many people that we didn't get a seat. We stood outside the room of the actual ceremony where we could watch it on a big screen where we could see the couple standing at a "secular altar" - Secular, because the man conducting the ceremony is not a priest. According to my Korean friend So-yeon, the ideal candidate to conduct the ceremony is an older man in a respected or high-ranking position, such as a university professor. She paid about $100 for the man who married her, and was able to tailor the style of ceremony to her needs, which in her case meant throwing in a few bible passages for her husband's religious family.

The ceremony itself was quick, and I didn't understand a word of it. Even if I had better Korean, I would not have been able to hear anything as people were milling about the lobby which made the big-screen Samsung impossible to hear.

Then comes the time for a few symbolic gestures. At the weddings I have attended over the last year and a half, I have seen a few common elements to these short ceremonies. In addition to one woman whose role is the Bride's Assistant (basically rearranging her dress every time she takes a step), there are often a few ladies dressed in what look like flight attendant uniforms with white gloves and sailor's caps. A champagne pouring contraption is often brought out, and the couple does a "couple shot" where they intertwine arms before sipping from their own glass. This happened at this particular wedding.

In terms of entertainment, sometimes a relative or friend will sing a song or play an instrument. I once saw a kid play an off-tune cello solo, and have also seen Karaoke-style serenades where bubbles were released and disco-lights started.

The groom often displays a physical feat, which I choose to read as a symbol of his strength and corresponding health and virility for that special night. He might get down on his white-gloved hands, and do a push-up with the bride sitting on his back. I have also seen a guy run a lap around the wedding hall room - no easy feat with huge hanbok skirts and guests in the way in the aisles.

After the ceremony, a series of pictures are taken. The first is of the couple with their immediate family. Parents are dressed in hanbok. Then comes the extended family, and then friends separately. I have also seen "foreign friends" and "Korean friends" separated as well.

The last shot of the photo shoot involved staging a bridal bouquet toss. As the guests, we were carefully arranged by the photographer aroung the couple. Our job was to smile and clap, as the bride tossed the bouquet towards.... the groom - three times.

But now all the friends were there - before the ceremony was over, people had already begun to walk out of the hall. They were headed for the buffet. The entire second floor of the building was dedicated to a huge cafeteria with white-table clothes and a buffet full of Korean food, salads, sushi, rice cakes, rices (of course I intend this to be plural), soups, meats, friend veggies, and an entire section dedicated to various types of kimchi.

When you walk in, someone snatches your ticket. All of the tables were full in this huge room. With my group of friends, we decided to separately scope out a spot. The only option was to hover over other people as they ate and wait for them to peace out. When we saw some people starting to pack their purses and stand, we ran over and pounced on the free seats before the waiters could make it to clear the plates.

How long did the whole she-bang take? An hour and a half. May they live happily ever after.